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How to Let Go of Someone You Still Love
Healing

How to Let Go of Someone You Still Love

Letting go isn’t just a decision — it’s a process.And when you still love them? It can feel impossible. But here’s the truth:You can love someone deeply… and still choose yourself. This is your guide to doing just that.Gently. Honestly. At your own pace. 💔 Why Letting Go Hurts So Much When we love someone, […]

May 23, 2025
3 min read
Tom Schindler

Letting go isn’t just a decision — it’s a process.
And when you still love them? It can feel impossible.

But here’s the truth:
You can love someone deeply… and still choose yourself.

This is your guide to doing just that.
Gently. Honestly. At your own pace.


💔 Why Letting Go Hurts So Much

When we love someone, we attach dreams, routines, and even our identity to them.

Letting go feels like:

  • Losing your “person”
  • Letting go of imagined futures
  • Mourning a version of yourself that only existed with them
  • Facing loneliness you didn’t choose

And that’s okay. That’s grief — not weakness.


🌿 Step 1: Acknowledge What You’re Letting Go Of

It’s not just the person.
You’re letting go of shared jokes, weekend rituals, safety, plans… maybe even the “idea” of love itself.

Write it out. Name what you’re releasing.
Because when you name it, you make space to feel it — and heal it.


🧠 Step 2: Accept What You Can’t Change

You can’t make them choose you.
You can’t go back and do it differently.
You can’t force closure from someone unwilling to give it.

But you can give yourself clarity, compassion, and choice.

Acceptance doesn’t mean approval.
It means: “This happened. And now I choose my next step.”


💌 Step 3: Feel It Fully

Don’t numb it. Don’t bypass it. Don’t rush into “healing vibes only.”

Let yourself:

  • Cry when it hits
  • Miss them without guilt
  • Rage when memories sting
  • Sit with the longing

Grief needs expression. Not suppression.
Feel it — so you can eventually feel free.


🧘 Step 4: Create Emotional Distance

This might mean:

  • Deleting their number
  • Muting or unfollowing them
  • Not rereading old messages
  • Avoiding their social spaces

Not because you’re immature.
But because your nervous system needs space to re-regulate.

Healing is hard enough — don’t reopen the wound daily.


🌙 Step 5: Reconnect With Yourself

After deep love, we often forget who we were before them.

Now is the time to:

  • Return to old passions
  • Discover new routines
  • Journal what brings you joy
  • Take yourself on solo dates
  • Redefine your values

You’re not just letting go of them — you’re rediscovering you.


🗣️ Step 6: Talk It Out

Holding it all inside will bury you.

Talk to:

  • A therapist
  • A trusted friend
  • A journal
  • Yourself

Say the hard things aloud. It’s a form of release.


🕯️ Step 7: Forgive — Even If They Don’t Deserve It

Forgiveness isn’t for them.

It’s for you — so you’re not anchored to bitterness.

It doesn’t mean forgetting.
It means choosing peace over poison.

Say it quietly:
“I forgive you. I forgive myself. I set us both free.”


✨ Step 8: Let Love Evolve

Just because it didn’t last doesn’t mean it wasn’t real.
Or that you’re unworthy of love.

Love again. Differently. Wisely.
But don’t let this ending build a wall around your heart.

You were made to love — and to be loved fully.


🤍 Final Words

You can love someone and still walk away.
You can miss them and still move forward.
You can grieve… and still grow.

Letting go doesn’t erase the love.
It honors it — and releases what’s no longer safe for your soul.

You’re not letting go because you didn’t love them enough.
You’re letting go because you finally love yourself enough.


Healing starts when you stop hoping the past will change — and start believing your future can be beautiful again. 💛

Tags

breakup recoveryemotional healinghealing after breakupheartbreak healinghow to move onletting goletting go of someonelove and lossself love after breakupunrequited love

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